The past two weeks have been a whirlwind... a stressful whirlwind at that. And a whirlwind of emotions. It’s been wild, to simplify. My husband and I had many hours of talk, and we decided I would go back to work.
When I started staying home, it made sense at that time. We were moving from one state to another with an 18-month-old. He had received a job offer, and even though I wasn’t 100% sure I wanted to quit working, we both knew that it would be easier for me to stay home with our boy at first (or at least until I had decided what I wanted to do). Financially, it worked, it was tight, but we were able to survive and still have money for savings or fun.
I’m glad I didn’t go back to work at that time because we ended up moving to Colorado after only being in New York for a few months. And again, it just made sense to stay home with our boy until we got settled AND until I decided what I wanted to do.
Fast-forward to now… various things influenced my decision, but I decided to look for a position. I wasn’t in a hurry, I just thought I’d look. Within 24 hours, I had found a perfect position. I had to quickly update my resume and LinkedIn page then I applied. Then I got the call for an interview. And lastly, I was giving a job offer. The position, the company, and the offer all worked for us, so I accepted. And then the nerves kicked in!
- Was I making the right decision? Maybe this wasn’t the right time to go back.
- What if this harms my very comfortable toddler? He and I had been staying home together for a year. What if this was precisely what he needed and what I needed? Would going back to work ruin us?
- What about free time? Sometimes I was able to sneak some in during nap time. I felt like I was able to dig into my hobbies and have "me" time. When would I sneak it in now?
- What if I hate working? I was worried I’d hate staying home, but I found my groove. So now, what will I do if I’m not able to be a happy little worker anymore?
Ugh! The anxiety made it hard to sleep and not worry.
But I bucked-up. The little guy and I toured daycares and found a good fit. He became excited to go to “school.” And once he turns three, then we can start preschool at the same place.
Then I started getting excited about work. Before I quit working over a year ago, I was working toward an essential Human Resources credential. I had to give that up when I quit, and I can now start that back up.
So even though it’s been a little crazy these past two weeks… getting a job, securing daycare and starting my new position… I’m finally feeling okay about it all. I’m looking forward to this new journey, and I’m excited to see the changes my family will experience.
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